Nikah, Bersanding, Ambil-ambilan, Mulih

Eight event: Majlis Nikah (the agreement). Usually holds on Fridays, this is when the groom and the bride sign their agreement/contract.

This event usually accompanied with Berian (refer previous posting)... (pic shows majlis Menapakan, the event after both groom and bride wear their wedding ring, and the groom reads a short prayer for blessing)

Ninth event: Majlis Bersanding/Perkahwinan (the wedding day or the BIG day). 99% holds on Sunday morning. From hundreds to thousands of people are invited. Also commonly holds on two different places between the groom and the bride. Lately people prefer to hold this event in a big hall. I did mine in chancellor’s hall with 3000 invited guests form both sides. Both groom and bride wear kain jongsarat/songket (a traditional golden weaved dress)

(pic on left shows a nephew wears yellow strip prior to accompanying the groom for "mandi bedian", right pic: the groom eats nasi kuning (yellow rice)

(Left: blowing off candles with 7 strings made-up of different colors, right: going to Masjid)

(the groom and the bride or the king and queen for the day)(pic at bride's house, the bride's family shakes with all invitees... and of course...biggg makan at the bride's house).
(back from the big day, get-together at the groom's house, chit-chat before going home... kind of reviewing of the events, what went well and what's not... or taking of someone they met, etc and etc.... actually the moment the pic was taken, we were waiting for ice-cream cake from DQ store). There are actually many more small events that are not captured here, like mandi pagi (morning shower), breakfast, wedding charriot (the car) preparation... some of them as simple as daily things and some are actually more than words..

Tenth event: Malam Ambil-ambilan. Event holds the night after the big day at bride’s place attended by both families and relatives. Both groom and bride may wear western dress, or uniform for uniformed staffs. This event is getting less and less popularity and usually replace with Thanks-giving prayer.

Eleventh event: Mulih 3-hari or 7-hari (the return of groom and bride to the groom’s place). The translation explains the whole thing

Berian

Seventh event: Maljis Mengahntar/Menerima Berian. This is when the groom sends his gifts to the bride and usually countered by the bride’s gifts. Gifts are usually bought together by the groom and the bride a few weeks or months before the events. On top of the gifts, there are also mandatory/compulsory “gifts” that the groom must surrender. The list of mandatory gifts is the outcome of Majlis Bersuruh’s terms and conditions, such as Belanja Hangus ($$$ gifts for the bride to hold the wedding), kain jongsarat (a traditional golden weaved cloth, usually around BND400 – BND5000). The range of gifts varies from person to another, some like to show-off with luxury stuffs such as Hugo Boss shoes and wallets and handbags, LV, Cerruti 1888, Platinum and Diamond rings and necklace, and some go for simple gifts. In terms of economics, total of gifts can reach over BND20,000.

Berdikir & berbedak

(final tough-up before going up on stage)

Sixth event: Majlis Berdikir dan Berbedak. Offical event, usually held Friday or Saturday night, when the groom/bride sits on a stage wearing “pakaian Brunei” (traditional jewelries, gold, kain jongsarat) and accompanied with dikir. Usually they invite quite a lot of people for this event including friends and neighbors. Special guests are invited to “membedaki” the groom/bride. After the event,... asian way again... makan/dinner... sometimes dpending on how fast they do the event, the dinner can be at 10pm! so if you think that you want to come, better have somthing first before attending the evening event. Note this event is hold separately between groom and bride. One thing worth mentioning here is that the “bedak” is made up of 7 different colors, why… uuuhhh I don’t know.

The night after the bebadak, the family and relatives usually gather to keep the "night young". Pic shows the youngs entertaining themselves with kareokee, the elders usually just sit around, watching news or talking about current news... and in some homes, they have traditional band/gambus!

Membuka bedak and Berpacar

Fourth event: Membuka badak. For both bride and groom. Occasion when they both start preparing for the wedding. Start with whole body scrub, installation of wedding stage, start wearing traditional jewelers (keroncong, for hands)…pic shows one of the ingredients used for the scrub… its NOT the same as body scrub you get in shops… the idea is the same but the ingredients are different… well in-a-way maybe about the same if you go for traditional scrub.

Fifth event: Berpacar. I can’t recall the name in English… this is when they color their fingers and feet with traditional coloring (orange color). Believes to be originated from India.

Malay wedding / perkahwinan Melayu

There are actually many stages during the wedding and it could takes more than a month, depending on which indigenous group they come from. Brunei Malay is actually made up of 7 indigenous groups, namely Melayu Brunei, Tutong, Belait, Kedayan, Bisaya, Dusun and Murut. The followings are just snap shot on some of the occasions for Melayu Brunei…

First event: Berjarum-jarum. This is when the groom’s family visited the bride’s family for the first time to get to know each other. Now a day this event is commonly hold in restaurants rather than in private residence. And surely, the bride’s family will not their daughter go out without knowing who she’s going out with… hence one way or the other both families will know each other.

Second event: Bersuruh. Official meeting between groom’s and the bride’s families to discuss on wedding occasion. Usually this is when the bride’s family gives their terms & conditions. (pic above: 2 rings: membuka mulut and tunang/engagement, obviously asian style... eaaattt first! and last pic shows the lead group rehearsal what to mention during the event later).

Third event: Pertunangan (engagement). The groom’s family visited the bride’s family again to surrender an engagement ring hence to book the bride. This event usually combined with Bersuruh

sorry for delay

sorry... too busy with many occassions and activities... including offshore duty, brother's wedding, offshore duty again, labuan trip... public or bank holidays.... name it.
anyhow... i have few articles coming up